I have often had parents ask how they can help their children relate better to Victor. The question also comes up with parents or educators wondering how to help children relate to peers with challenging trauma behaviors. My answer is always the same - it starts with the adults. The children who relate the best to Victor are also the ones whose parents take time to engage with him and who talk with their children about loving others. They model acceptance and care.
The opposite is also true. Parents, please watch what you say in front of your children. Watch how you act. It will come through loud and clear.
Victor received this picture from a little friend at school.
It says, "Dear Victor, my birthday is in 4 days. My mommy doesn't want you over."
I'm sure this mother has no idea what her child wrote. I'm sure she had no intention for her words to be shared with the object of their at-home conversation. But they were.
Be careful. Your children are watching and listening.
Be kind.
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