Welcome to the KingZoo and Funny Farm, where we learn to live, laugh, and love together. Here you'll find snippets of life in our zoo, parenting tips we've learned along the way, reflections on shining God's light in this world, passions in the realm of orphan care and our journey as parents of a visually impaired child. Have fun!

Friday, November 25, 2016

Pass the gravy

If you left your bed at all over the past few weeks, it was pretty obvious that many people were concerned for the Thanksgiving holidays. Not us. We had a plan. During our two hour trip to visit with family, we determined that if any conversation even came near politics, someone would yell, "Would you please pass the gravy?" Never mind if dinner wasn't even being served, it seemed to us like a plan that could be successful.

Thankfully (see what I did there?), our Thanksgiving was free and clear and no one had to request the gravy. Although during the two hour trip home we did find out that there were two near-misses where the word gravy was on the tongue but just that quick, wasn't necessary.

We forgot, however, that the King family needn't have been concerned like the rest of the US because we had our own personal reason to be scared for too much family togetherness. His name is Victor.

I think maybe we let our guard down because up until the hour before we were to leave, the worst that had happened was that Victor had hurt an uncle's feelings by calling him by the wrong name (an uncle on the other side of the family, no less) and he had called most of us stupid at least once for not allowing him to do something he wanted but which was not allowed. As an example, Eden got it once because she wouldn't let Victor play with my dad's Phillies bat collection. What do you mean he wasn't allowed to use Steve Carlton's bat as a drumstick on their walls? I guess it could be argued she had it coming, right?

But then....

The adults were all quietly sitting around watching a slide show of my parents' recent trip to Italy, and enjoying the stories of their time there. And, if we're totally honest, letting Thanksgiving dinner digest. The four youngest cousins were upstairs doing what youngest cousins do best - have fun together. This particular bit of fun involved sliding down the stairs on their backsides.

And then, as also usually happens with youngest cousin fun, we heard thump thump bam crash thump bam bump.

But it wasn't a person. It was a briefcase. My brother's briefcase. Laptop included.

"Mom, Victor threw it down the steps!"

Well, yay for us? We almost made it out of Thanksgiving unscathed. Almost.

Would someone please pass the gravy?

Go ahead, enjoy some pictures of a simpler, happier time - the annual Thanksgiving day craft...




Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Piano lessons

You know that feeling, the one that arrives just after you've done something that you thought would be a great idea, but turned out to be not-so-great and now you're suffering the consequences?

Yeah, that happened to one of us last night.

We were all sitting around chatting, having a lovely evening  with cousin Molly, when the child enjoying the conversation from the piano bench, started exploring the nooks and crannies and crevices of the piano with his phone. Since one must always look for the silver lining, it would be that he was not at that moment on his phone. In fact, he ended up not being on his phone for many moments after that because to his utter horror, sometimes phones go in piano crevices and then they don't come back out.

If you are similarly addicted to your phone, you can imagine what was going through this young man's mind at this point. To be disconnected from an electronic device, even if only temporarily, could be as damaging to a person's psyche as finding out that your fly was down - all day - when you not only gave a speech to the entire student body in such a fashion but also spent thirty minutes flirting with the cheerleading squad and thought their shy smiles and giggles meant they were similarly infatuated with you but you later found out it was just that stupid fly being down.

Panic ensued. First, he slyly attempted to bring in reinforcements by nonchalantly calling over the brother with the most handy-man skills. But the tone of his voice and the waver in the syllables sent an immediate signal to the whole room: Major Situation in Need of Attention. Stat!

It was so obvious that even the Good Old Doctor got out of his chair in record time (even more amazing since it was his birthday and he was enjoying his lazy-day position in that chair).

Halfway through the dismantling of the piano and the Good Old Doctor could be overheard saying, "Shoun, you need a better filter for your life." Okay, maybe not parent-of-the-year-worthy but true. At least this time.

But, since one must always be looking for the silver lining, it would be that not only was the phone eventually found in the deep recesses of the piano but so was another item that had gone missing (from the same child, mind you). "Oh look," he exclaimed, "and here's my pick from my afro days!"

Yay to lessons learned! You're almost there, son, almost there!

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Good Old Doctor

Someone suggested that in honor of the Good Doctor's birthday we should start calling him the Good Old Doctor. Maybe. He does seem to be forgetting more and more (and we weren't exactly starting with a stellar memory to begin with).

For example, I purchased a delicious-sounded authentic Indian meal from a friend's adoption auction a few weeks ago. I thought it sounded like a great birthday present - what father of 9 wouldn't like an evening of adult conversation with his wife and four other friends (did I mention there would be no children present) and bonus, his wife wouldn't be frazzled from meal preparation nor would anyone have to clean up afterward. Since I knew he would see emails being passed around, I told him all about this gift at the time of its purchase. I thought it was a great idea. I thought he liked it, too. Today he couldn't remember conversation or gift.

Anyone want to join me and 4 friends for an authentic Indian meal?

But I also got him a fun little gift, one that I've been wanting since the spring when I saw it on someone else's doorstep. You see, as a continuation of Sunday's post, we've had doorbell problems for about 12 years. A few years back the Good Doctor did attempt to solve the problem but it was a half-hearted attempt and resulted in one of two doorbells working. Of course the one that still doesn't have a working doorbell is the door that we use the most.

So now people know what to do.

Oh, and I explained to the Good Old Doctor why he was receiving such a gift for his birthday, just so he knows how much I love him.

This may seem more like a gift you would give to me (as in one that is really for you) but it comes with the loving promise to never, ever nag you about fixing the doorbell. Happy Birthday!

Sunday, November 20, 2016

Tale of two closets and two boots

We've been enjoying a visit from our lovely, niece, Molly. One of the highlights of her visit has been learning that so many of the Good Doctor's quirks are actually not quirks but are instead more likely the result of genetics. It has been confirmed that her father, who is also my husband's oldest brother, and the Good Doctor have very many traits in common. Now, I get that whole nature vs. nurture thing so maybe it's not genetics but maybe it was in the water when they were growing up or maybe it comes from growing up near all those mortician's chemicals or maybe even the by-product of being exposed to so many dead bodies. Whatever the reason, it's nice to know that I am not alone in what I have to put up with. There is most definitely comfort in numbers.

And it didn't take us long to figure this out. Not even an hour after Molly had arrived I had to explain to her how to survive in the room we assigned to her for the duration of her visit. Being as kind to the Good Doctor as possible, I explained to Molly that she would need to leave the door to the closet open in the room since it wasn't until after the room was created that the Good Doctor realized the heat vent was in the closet. The bonus is that your clothes will be nice and toasty when getting dressed on cold winter mornings. The downside is that if you forget to leave the closet door open, you will not be nice and toasty on cold winter nights. I also felt it necessary to explain that the Good Doctor had plans to fix this quirk but that since we have been waiting for seven plus years already, she shouldn't expect it to happen during her stay. She assured me that it was no problem and that she understood; there were projects in their house that never did get fixed so her parents just moved instead.

So thats how it works. Looks like we'll be moving soon.

Even better? As I relayed this information to Molly, the Good Doctor expressed his total amazement that this bedroom had heat only in the closet. Apparently he had forgotten. Another one of those family traits. This one I chalk up to the chemicals. Definitely the chemicals.

Well, there seems to be a closet theme around here this week because another closet with another one of those home fix-it jobs that has yet to be completed is fixing the light in my bedroom closet. This project is a bit older, going on about 10 years and as HopeAnne so delightedly reminded us, that's as old as her. So, it cannot all be blamed on me that when I reached into the dark closet this morning to pull out my boots, I inadvertently pulled out two different boots. I will, however, take full credit for not double-checking that I had a pair before putting them on. No one at home decided to enlighten me so it wasn't until after I had been at church for about 30 minutes and was walking down the hallway that I noticed something suspicious: my left boot was making a squeaking sound.

This was significant because this was an odd side effect of wearing my old pair of boots but since one of them had lost a heel last winter, I broke down and bought a new pair this fall (Yes, I wore them with one broken heel for that long and yes, since I'm such a cheapskate, I was still wearing them even though I had bought a new pair because, well, they still had some life in them so why waste a good pair of shoes? At least I had a back-up just in case something worse happened to the old pair.) So I looked down to investigate into why my new pair of boots might be squeaking like the old pair. And that is when I saw this:

Proof positive that
1. I should always look to confirm that my shoes of choice are actually a matching pair.
2. I don't branch out much when choosing new clothes; same color, same heel height, similar looks.

The good news is that I have now gotten rid of the old pair. It's always good to be proactive. Yay for me!

Saturday, November 19, 2016

An interview

A long time ago in what seems a galaxy far, far away, I interviewed Eden and HopeAnne with similar questions. Today, it was Victor's turn. Rather than cutting and pasting and posting on Facebook as I was instructed (that may mean I get a week of bad luck or maybe I won't win the lottery or maybe you'll unfriend me, but I'll take my chances), it seemed appropriate to post here so at the year when I bind it into a book, our family will have these answers for posterity...

An Interview with Victor Noah King

1. What is your name?
VICTOR! (Victor was very enthusiastic about some of his responses.)

2. What's my name?
Mommy...Cindy King...Joy

3. What's Daddy's name?
John King

4. Where do you live?
At pretty school...At April 13

5. How old are you?
FREE!

6. When is your birthday?
APRIL 13! *Question mark* (apparently he thought we were using The Good Doctor's voice recognition software)

7. How old is daddy?
Free...Ummmm, 8...How old is Daddy, Mom?

8. What is your favorite color?
Red

9. What's your favorite food?
Baked oatmeal...pizza

10. Who's your best friend?
Elmo

11. What is your favorite show?
Puppet show

12. What's your favorite song?
Now is the Time to Seize the Day and Uptown Funk

13. What is your favorite animal?
No penguin...a goat

14. What are you scared of?
The jackhammer...the big, big scary vacuum

15. What makes you happy?
People...a song

16. What do you want to be when you grow up?
Isaac and Shoun and Eden

17. What does love mean?
It means that puppy love...protector...love...and sleeping


Monday, November 14, 2016

Look and listen

It's almost one-week post election. The negative ads have stopped and for that I am thankful. However, I didn't expect to find even more and vicious name calling and disparaging remarks between groups of people on social media.

Let's be honest, most of live and work within a narrow and limited demographic. Even when we try to position ourselves in a diverse community or workplace we find that even that diversity has its own limited demographic. In that regard, I am grateful to social media for allowing me to have much more diversity in my friendships. Prior to social media, if I stepped out of my comfort zone or that which was "normal" for me for a period of time, my future connectedness with those individuals would be much more limited. Now, the typical pattern is to meet, interact, exchange our social media contact information, and continue to keep in touch at least in some form.

During this election, and especially post-election, I have been pleasantly surprised to find that my friends are pretty evenly split in a 3-way tie, one group having voted for Trump, one for Clinton, and one for neither. The downside to this is that every time I open up my computer I find post after post, article after article, comment after comment with one side disparaging and name-calling the other. This saddens me as neither side seems to really want to get to know the other; only to display his/her own virtues above the other's.

Now, more than ever, we need to look at each other with love. We need to admit our own flaws and blindspots and be willing to have them exposed. We need to look at the plank in our own eye while we to listen to each other with grace. It is easy but simplistic for us to see someone only as the group to which we believe they belong. When we stop to look at the individual, to really get to know that person, and to hear their story, we find that there is so much more below the surface. There is a story that we never knew. Many stories, really. Stories of pain and rejection, hopefully stories of victories and encouragement, but together, those stories are what motivates behavior. I cannot simply choose a box in which to place you based off of a surface relationship with you and I hope you will not choose a box for me - until you really know me. Because often, when we choose a box in which to place someone before taking the time to really know them, we later find that we picked the wrong packaging. How unfortunate to never really know someone and to miss the chance to touch a life for the better and to find our own lives blessed as well.

1 Peter 3:9a
Never return evil for evil or insult for insult (scolding, tongue-lashing, berating), but on the contrary blessing [praying for their welfare, happiness, and protection, and truly pitying and loving them].

Saturday, November 12, 2016

Victor-isms go on and on...

I'm so pretty-ish.
********************
On my birthday Victor brought me a kiddie chair from his room.
"Here's a special chair for your birthday, Mom."
I gave him a napkin to wash his face.
"It's a special washcloth for your birthday."
********************
Victor has just started to enjoy "drawing" which of course is just scribbling with a marker. I'm not sure what this means to him or how much of it he might be able to see. He scribbled a picture and gave it to me, telling me it was Abraham. Then he told me he was going to draw me a red flower. Except that he had a gray marker. Next he drew a blue flower for Eden. With the gray marker. Hope got a pink Abraham. With that same gray marker. Colors, obviously, have no meaning for him although if you ask him his favorite color he will tell you it's red.
********************
Storytelling by Victor
*It really should be recorded visually so you can see that he is moving the whole time he's telling his story.
*This is an actual stream-of-consciousness story by Victor. Well, as actual as it could be. I furiously typed while Victor spoke.
*He clearly struggles with pronouns but loves his adverbs.

"In my German class I played with my son, Frau.  Her name is Frau Miller Johnnsy. And then she fell in the toilet but she got up by herself and she said, 'Some people are going to share.' And then she got up from the sofa and was going to share but then she was lost and I was lonesome but then they came back to me. When they happily came to me they said, 'You can go to Miss. Cindy's house. You should be kind.' That's what they said. And they said Dear God when they yelled and screamed but she didn't care and he did something but she didn't care about him. His name is Deanna and she taught me some things. Putting the speakers in the microphone, yeah, they do and she was speaking in there and she thought that they broke. Then they were working now. She happily kissed the microphone and the speakers. What does that mean? So she went away from them and she thought to play with my friend, Josiah. He had to clean the whole room and start to sleep in her bed and she woke him up. She fell in the water and she got up, stood up and then she went to the speaker where they were talking and they happily went to the drums and they played and she heard them. And the drum microphone, the bass was in there. That's all she was hearing. She happily banged on the drum. It quickly happened that she happened to speak in the bass microphone and then she heard the bass and then she heard a drum. So when the story is finished you need to line up at the door and you should open the door. So when she decided to take a nap and woke up in German class, when she did that, she burned herself and then she was at the ER and then she came back to me. She said, 'Go to Miss. Cindy's house. You should be quiet.' She carefully fell in the fire. She didn't smell like smoke but then she went out. MomMom and PopPop were hammering. They had to go downstairs, vacuum, clean up the dirt and I helped PopPop hammer and then I did it myself. When they finished hammering they went home. The End. "
********************
I brought Victor some chips and he said, "Thank you, McDonald's woman."
********************
Victor: What does Oscar do?
Me: He lives in a trashcan and he's grouchy. That means that he's grumpy.
Victor: Yeah, like you when you're upset.
Me: Touche. Especially when you wake me up in the middle of the night.
********************
My cough is still cough-ee. I need to go to the doctor and take my cough.
********************
Victor: Ooooo! You scared me!
Me: How did I scare you?
Victor: Your mouth.