On Christmas Eve day in the afternoon

I kind of got sidetracked from my Christmas Eve recap.  That whole gift of a visit from a great friend just got me all befuddled.

Anyway, gifts ended and it was time for the traditional family brunch where everyone helps.  Cinnamon rolls are a given.  Everyone helps to make and everyone helps to clean up.

Game time is next.  This year we started with a family funny book contest.  I went through all those books where I've written the cute and curious things the kids have said and I made them into a contest.  Andrew won.  See, Andrew, it appears as if there are times when being the oldest is a help not a hindrance.

How would you do with this sampling from our quiz (answers at the end of the post)?

1.  Who thought the angels in the Christmas story said, “Behold, I bring you good movies.” 

2.  Who enjoyed watching the toasts at a wedding so much that he/she said, “I want to be a toaster when I grow up?”  

3.  Who was watching football on TV with Daddy and said, “Look, Philistines!” 

4.  Who said, “I’m a poet and didn’t even figure it out yet,” erroneously assuming this rhymed like the real saying.  

5.  Who saw an inflatable mummy at Halloween and said, “Look, Mommy, it’s the man Jesus brought out.”  

6.  Who watched The Sound of Music and described it this way:  Mom, they have seven children…There was a lady who was a Mun, or something like that.  She was always late and she never got to pray so her punishment was that she had to help this family that has 7 children.”  

7.  Who called shorts, “Legs-sticking-out”?  

We also played Left-Center-Right but instead of playing with chips to be passed around, each child started with 10 pieces of their favorite candy.  We played in rounds of 3 minutes and at the end of each round you could place a piece of your remaining candy into a bag to be kept.

And we couldn't forget the yearly race to finish a task.  Last year it was a small Lego building set.  This year it was a puzzle.  It was funny to watch how each personality approached puzzle making.  All those puzzles get donated to other children in the weeks to come.

This year we added Christmas caroling to the neighbors to our day's activities.  Since we moved here 10 years ago, 5 neighbors have lost a spouse.  Two of these deaths occurred this year, one of them just before Christmas.  It was good to spend a portion of our day spreading the blessing of Christmas.  I hope this is a tradition that continues.

What are your Christmas traditions?

*Answers to the quiz questions:  The questions go in order from oldest to youngest, Andrew, Jesse, Mariana, Shoun, Isaac, Eden and HopeAnne

Best gift ever

If you are familiar with the 5 Love Languages then you know that one of them is gift giving.  Unfortunately for the Good Doctor, this isn't in his top 4.  To make matters worse, it's in my top 2.  But that's the way it goes.

I've learned to handle it by not setting my expectations too high.  That way I can ooh and aah and sound excited when I receive a dish pan or frying pan or even the annual pajamas and a candle.  From Wal-mart.  Purchased the day before.  But who's counting?

So imagine my surprise when the Good Doctor gave me the best gift ever -

 He was so excited he almost opened the card intended for me.

Auntie Katrina is coming from Utah to visit!  If you don't remember, Katrina is a great friend and was a huge part of our adoption journey.  After reading the news in a card from the Good Doctor, I was able to enjoy not one, not two, but three "I'm coming to PA" videos from Katrina.  Just think, she's giving up the slopes and her daycare toddlers to spend some time with us!

The Good Doctor did such a good job with this gift that I even voluntarily spoke his love language, even if for the briefest of moments.

I'm so excited to be picking her up from the airport today.  How fun it will be to reconnect after all those memorable moments together in Utah.  She has been such a special part of our journey.

I just hope she's as excited to spend a few days in a house full of ten as I am to have her visit.  She may need a long vacation after this vacation.

Christmas Traditions

Traditions are great and our kids need them.  Some come from our home of origin while others morph over time.  I'm definitely a traditions kind of mom.

Ours start Christmas Eve Eve.  Since one of our traditions is to sleep over at MomMom and PopPop's house Christmas Eve, we have our celebration on the day before Christmas.  Thus, the early start.

Christmas Eve Eve includes family movie night except that often, family movie night becomes two family movie nights because it's difficult to find something for everyone.  And Christmas Eve practice at church kind of cut into the Christmas Eve Eve family movie night as well so next year I'm putting my foot down, no one leaves the house after 6PM.  Family and traditions trump everything else, after all.

Anyway, 6PM is the whole family movie.  Then, after the younger kids go to bed, 8PM is the big kids' movie.  So far we've done popular 80s movies but I suppose we will run out at some point and either have to start over or move into the next decade.  It's been fun to introduce the kids to some of our favorite movies and to have mature conversations afterward.  Of course special snacks, not normally found in our house, are included.

Christmas morning starts with a little something to hold you over until brunch.  This year the children found instructions and a daily schedule (with approximate times but enough information so I didn't have to answer the same questions X7 all day long).  Their first assignment, while everyone was gathering, was to write encouraging notes to their grandparents.  When all were awake, or at least upright, we sat down together.  This year we finished the Jesse Advent Tree, then spent some time debriefing from the events of 2013, and had a time of prayer.  Then, one of my favorite parts, reading the encouraging notes we wrote to each other and placed in our stockings.  A few years ago we did this in lieu of stocking gifts and we've enjoyed it so much that it's been a treasured tradition.  I may or may not have cried a bit during this part.

Of course there are gifts.  The children exchange names and that's always a fun time so they went first.  There's always someone who has given it away ahead of time but HopeAnne was the hero of the gift exchange this year.  She had Shoun's name but every time Jesse tried to torment her and ask her again to tell him whose name she had, she'd always respond, "Jesse."  She stuck with it so well that she even had him almost fooled into thinking that she did have his name.  It was all her idea to make Shoun a blanket.

There were a lot of special gifts this year including a handmade picture from Mariana...

...car decals for John (just to make people look twice as he drives around town in a small car presumably filled with 10)...

...a Cookie Monster from Andrew to his Secret Santa, Victor, who promptly chewed on his new toy (Victor did the chewing, that is).  Victor also had Andrew and chose this shirt all by himself ...

...noise makers for Victor made by Eden and HopeAnne (yes, they did use empty pill bottles and yes, we did cover up the labels so he wouldn't look like such a druggie, and yes, we did use childproof caps and yes, we did hot glue gun the lids just to be safe)...

...footie PJs from the boys, who insisted I open their gifts at the same time, just to be fair...

...handmade scarves from Jesse...

...and tune in tomorrow for the best gift of all (but here's a hint)...

So blessed

Our 2013 Christmas Card - Merry Christmas!

So blessed…

Our lives have been an open book this year.  Many of you have followed our 2013 journey on Facebook and on this blog. We considered not writing a Christmas letter this year since we don’t want to bore you with the same story over and over.  On the other hand, we decided we really want to thank our family and friends again for the many ways you supported and encouraged us this year.  We are so blessed.

As we announced last Christmas, we moved into 2013 expectantly waiting to hear a yes from a birth mother; to finally be matched with a child in need of a home.  In March, Eden got tired of waiting.  She told Cindy that she was going to pick a date and pray that we would be matched by that date.  She chose April 20 and later added 5PM.  Sure enough, on April 20 at 4PM, upon arriving home from a concert, we found 3 emails about potential matches.  The third one was a long shot and the caseworker knew it.  She asked if we’d consider a micro preemie born 15 weeks early weighing only 1 lb. 13 oz.  She acknowledged the medical risk involved and also the logistics of this case – the baby was in a NICU in Utah.  By the end of the week we knew that God had chosen this particular baby for us, a baby we named Victor Noah King.  We were so blessed.

Our faith community immediately surrounded us.  They prayed for us, provided meals and transportation and volunteered to fill needs we didn’t even know we had. For Cindy, living in Utah for 3 months was a life-altering adventure.  She visited Victor daily, watching prayerfully during his good days and bad days.  “Don’t forget to breathe” became our new mantra.  Finally, at the end of July, Victor came home to be with his forever family.  We were surrounded with blessing.

In October we received the devastating news that Victor has little, if any, sight.  Our hearts break at this news as we grieve what Victor doesn’t have but we rejoice at what he does have – life and a family to love him.  We are committed to giving him all the opportunities available to him.  His name came from a promise from God that our baby would be victorious.  Through him many have been, and will continue to be, blessed.

But of course that’s not all that has happened in the King household this year.  Life goes on even in the midst of adoption, Mom moving to Utah and home again, and the day-to-day with a newborn.  We are all blessed as we explore the talents God has uniquely gifted to us and as we share them with others.

Andrew graduated from Mechanicsburg High School this spring.  He was one of three students selected to give a graduation speech.  His words showed maturity and depth and challenged his classmates to look for ways to serve others. He is currently a freshman at Asbury University, majoring in media communications.

Jesse is a junior at Mechanicsburg High School, looking ahead to college visits and major decisions in the next year.  He served as football mascot for the third year in a row, running around as the crazy Wildcat.  He just auditioned for district chorus and made it in as 9^th chair cellist.

Mariana enrolled at Capital Area School for the Arts for her sophomore year, doing what she does best and loves most.  This year she has performed as Millie in Millie and Nurse Preen in The Man Who Came to Dinner and she has a lead role in the high school’s upcoming spring musical.

Shoun decided to try flag football through Upward this year and thinks he’ll be a professional football player some day.  If that doesn’t work out he’s thinking he may be well suited for a career in social work or psychology. We agree. He is in 7^th grade and is cyber schooled. 

Isaac is also in 7^th grade and is still homeschooled.  He is moving right along in viola lessons and also plays for the West Shore Symphony Orchestra.  Unfortunately, a soccer injury and resulting broken wrist have had him sidelined for a few weeks but hopefully he will be back soon.

Eden is also homeschooled.  She is in 3^rd grade.  She has performed in three shows at Allenberry Playhouse this year.  She was Molly in Annie, the young neighbor in Wait Until Dark, and is currently a Christmas elf with Isaac.

HopeAnne is in 1^st grade at home.  She decided to try acting this summer so was an orphan with Eden in Annie.  She also competed with the Healthy Kids Running Series and placed 1^st in all 5 races.  She loves gymnastics classes as well.

And we can’t forget about John.  He finally finished his doctoral degree in Counselor Education and Supervision from Regent University.  Like father, like son, he also was asked to give a speech at graduation.  He says he’ll finally be able to get to that honey-do list now.

A year ago we never could have imagined the highs and lows that 2013 would bring.  Through it all, we can say with confidence that we are blessed.  We have joy, we have peace, and we have love.  We have family and we have hope in Christ.  We don’t need to know what 2014 holds because we trust that He knows the journey He’s leading us on. He knows every detail. He knows each hurt we’ll pass through as well as each joy-filled moment.  And it is always His will to bless us. 

May you step out in faith and may your eyes be opened to the blessings found in Christ’s love, joy, and peace as you journey through 2014.  That is our prayer for you.  Thank you for the blessing you have been to us; for your prayers, your acts of service and your words of encouragement, your financial support and your sacrificial giving in so many ways.

Happy 4th

Of course my morning started at the hospital, feeding Victor.  Unfortunately, neither of us had anything slightly patriotic to wear.  Funny how I typically wear a lot of red but in my attempts to be a minimalist out here, I have absolutely no red, white, or blue.  Oh well.

Apparently 4th of July Pancake Breakfasts are the thing out here.  Is this a tradition that our forefathers started but I don't know about?  No problem, I can go for all-you-can-eat breakfast anytime.  We  chose the one at Snowbird Ski and Summer Resort.  And the Dixie band was awesome as well.

Then a trip up the mountain in a tram.  Can everyone say, "Oooooooo," altogether now, as we go through every bump.

The view was gorgeous in every direction.

This is so I could tell the Good Doctor how many zeros high we were.

Victor celebrated the fourth with a stuffy nose.  Please pray this away.  It's annoying to him and is obviously bothering him during feedings.

He now weights 5 lb. 3.5 oz.  He's allowed bottles for 6 of his 8 daily feedings. He's doing just fine, even downing one bottle in a record 10 minutes yesterday.  He must know that food doesn't stick around long at our house before the vultures swoop in asking, "You gonna eat that?  You gonna finish that?  Can I have that?"

Another brady last night.  Jesus, heal Victor's lungs and tell him to keep on breathing.  They mostly happen early in the morning, either during or right after a feeding, presumably as he is experiencing reflux.  Interestingly, he does not have trouble while he is sitting up during bottle feeds.  I also make sure I continue to hold him upright for another 15-30 minutes.  In my non-medical opinion, it helps.

And great news, the neonatologist said one to one and a half weeks until we're out of here!  That goes right along with the nurse practitioner's prediction of 2 weeks, spoken a few days ago.  It brings tears to my eyes to know that we are so close.  Praise Jesus!

Partnership

Two nights ago I was on an adoptive Momma's Facebook page, looking for a video she had posted earlier.  In the process of looking for the video, I found her husband's Mother's Day Facebook tribute.  In it, he lovingly sang her praises for partnering in raising their children who he called an "amalgamation of Rain Man, Nell, and the Boy in the Plastic Bubble."  See, these two have learned the key to surviving through the storms of life - partnership and laughter.

I immediately copied and pasted the message and emailed it to the Good Doctor.  He responded with this message:

Dear Cindy Joy King, or Laura Sybil, or whoever you are, even though you may have dragged me into this thing a few years ago kicking and screaming, you have influenced my life more than you will ever know.  You are an amazing Proverbs 31 mom...go ahead and look it up...and through it all you have not only survived, but thrived.  AND on top of that, you have willingly (or not so willingly) laid down your life for the least of these.  As Jean Valjean said, "To love another person is to see the face of God."  I love you!  Take that for your blog!

Challenge accepted.

I know that there are singles who parent alone and there are singles who adopt.  They have my full praise because I could not do it.  God knew that to raise our family we would need a good dose of reality, level-headedness, and unconditional love mixed in with my stubbornness, organization, and humor.  And as this video so clearly states, I suppose one of us had to be the brake every time I wanted to press on the accelerator.

So even though it's not Father's Day yet and even though the Good Doctor had the audacity to go out to eat to celebrate Mother's Day without me, I'm so thankful we're walking this road together.  God knew what he was doing when he took this very shy girl from PA and sent her 10 hours away to college.  He knew what he was doing when he gave you that early morning class first semester so you'd meet me in the dining hall.  I can still remember sitting in your dorm room, telling you that I planned to adopt 20 special needs children.  I don't know why you didn't run when you had the chance.  Probably the same reason that I didn't quit when you said no way, you weren't adopting any children.  And you still asked me to marry you after all that.  Maybe you thought I'd get over it.   Maybe you didn't quite understand how stubborn I could be?

But here we are.  Right where we are supposed to be.  And we don't look a day older, do we?  Well, that depends.  The Good Doctor summed it up this way:

I'm crazy in love with this woman.  She's the accelerator, I am the brake.  If we were both accelerators we would crash, and if we were both brakes, we would never get anywhere.  So we work together as a team, even though we are in two different states for now, and even though our children are in two different states right now.  We're family!

And there's still plenty of time to get to 20 kids.  Right, dear?

Victor's day was split in two yesterday.  In the morning he had quite a number of desats, some of which needed quite a bit of prodding and stimulation to remind him to breathe again.  We did some skin-to-skin from 1 to 2, a whole hour!  He did so well.  He spent the first half of our time trying to look up at me again and then settled in quite relaxed.  But not too relaxed.  We have to remember to breathe!  While I was out for lunch, the pressure on his high flow nasal cannula was weaned from 6 to 5.5.  Baby steps of progress.  Always Victor-sized baby steps.

Praise God for a clear head ultrasound!  No sign of bleeding!

He did lose another 1/2 ounce yesterday.  Pray that from now on it's only packing on the pounds (gaining "wate" as Eden wrote me in an email).

Pray protection over his eyes.

Pray that he remembers to breathe!  It is NOT an option, Victor!

Pray for miracles!

All comfy and cozy.