Pray for the one

I just finished packing up her bedroom. The beautiful, highlighter marker blue bedroom that a community helped to create. Everything that was given to her is all washed, folded, and safely stored. She came with one suitcase and a few things in a garbage bag. Waiting for her now are 3 suitcases full plus 3 smaller bags besides.  You loved well. We loved well.

Barring a miracle, she is choosing not to return. It breaks our hearts but we cannot force it; would not want to force it. Love can be given and light can be offered but there is always freedom to choose to accept and to someday, hopefully, reciprocate. For now, it's just too hard.

It doesn't mean that we have given up on her. Far from it. We cry for the 1 even when surrounded by the 99. We break for the vulnerable one, the one filled with fear and shame and who, for now, cannot see beyond the hurt.

The past couple of days I have not been able to shake the thought that I need to ask for more purposeful prayer. God has impressed upon me that she came on a Thursday and she left on a Thursday. Since I can't shake the thought, I have to think there is something significant there. I know what it's like when a prayer request is right in front of you. You remember it often. If you keep a written list, it's there. But time goes on, you forget, it gets buried in the list. We begin to wonder if the prayers matter. Let us not forget! For 16 years no one knew to pray, no one cared. But now we know and we can't forget. The love of the Father, that goes after the one, won't let us forget.

So, I have two ways for us to remember. The first is to declare Thursday the day to remember to pray for our one. If you let me know that you are committing to this task, then I will try to find a way to remind you every now and then.

The second is to pray when you hear Bethel Music's song, No Longer Slaves. There are songs that were part of the process of bringing HopeAnne, then Shoun and then Victor into our home. Whenever I hear those songs now, even 9 years later, my thoughts go right back to those moments of desperate trust. There are several that I heard while we were fighting the system, moving mountains, and breaking chains to show her what family and love look like, but No Longer Slaves is actually a memory someone else shared with me. One of the high school youth leaders shared with me how she saw our daughter singing the phrase, "I am a child of God," when this song was sung one Sunday night. Oh, how we pray that someday she will know her worth, that all her fears will be gone, that she will know love and family.

You unravel me, with a melody
You surround me with a song
Of deliverance, from my enemies
Till all my fears are gone

I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

From my Mothers womb
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again, into your family
Your blood flows through my veins

You split the sea, so I could walk right through it
All my fears were drowned in perfect love 
You rescued me, so I could stand and sing 
I am a child of God

Some people have told me that in tough times they don't want to hear that God has a purpose for the pain but I want you to remind me of that. Please tell me there is purpose! Without it, why love til it hurts? For me, there is hope in knowing that there is a plan much greater than my finite eyes can see.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 1 Cor. 13: 12 - 13

Miracles still happen. We are called to care for the vulnerable. We are called to ask the God of the Universe and He will answer. In His time and His way, He will answer. Foster care is spiritual battle. Won't you join us in mobilizing the forces of Heaven?