There is a part of Victor's story that I haven't shared much. Maybe I've hoped it would not be a reality if I ignored it. Maybe I just didn't want to see it in print or hear the words plainly spoken. It is this: The condition that has caused Victor's vision loss is also associated with a number of other medical conditions including, but not limited to, seizures, endocrine issues including stunted growth, mental retardation, and behavior issues such as aggression and over eating.
The ophthalmologist prepared us with dire warnings of all of these. Thankfully the endocrinologist has so far been less concerned. An initial exam, bloodwork, and his statement that these secondary issues are only present in 20% of the cases have helped to suppress the fear and worry. However, there are other concerns. It is apparent, and was as early as Victor's first bottle in the NICU, that he does not have a shut off valve when full. He will eat until you stop feeding him and I've had to do my own trial and error to determine how much to feed him. Further, the neonatal follow-up clinic is concerned because his head circumference is growing at a much slower rate than his height and weight.
In my humble opinion, Victor has suffered enough and I don't think any of us need anything else to deal with for a long time. But I learned a long time ago that my opinion isn't always the best one when orchestrating lives in the universe. There's a much larger picture, a battle being fought, and lives in the balance. I know I'm much better off placing this in much larger, more capable hands.
I am asking, begging, God to spare Victor from any other physical or mental hardship. I ask you to ask for the same thing.
We thank you.
2 Corinthians 4: 17-18 “For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever. So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.”
Dear Lord, Please spare little Victor from any other physical or mental hardship. In Christ's name, Amen
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