Like this

To say that I am not a fan of the habitually annoying incorrect use of the word "like" would be an understatement.  I do not speak in such a manner around the house yet my offspring have adopted this word as if they were getting paid for each utterance.

I have tried many ways to curb this habit.  Effective for one child was the reward of money.  I would start the day with two pockets full of quarters, one for each of the worst offenders home during the day.  Each time the word was used incorrectly, a quarter would be removed from that child's designated pocket.  At the end of the day, whatever was left belonged to that child.  One child got rich.  The other, well, not even a quarter.  One kicked the habit, the other dug his heels in deeper and the addiction became stronger.

Just the other day I asked him how much money he had in response to his request to make a purchase.  He told me, "I have, like, 4 or 5 dollars."  I asked for a recount as I am positive that when he gets to the check-out, the cashier is not going to say, "That will be, like, $5.00," and allow him to, like, pay whatever amount he happens to have.

I can't imagine being a high school teacher or college professor and having to listen to student speeches.  I hereby apologize to the Asbury University professors for sending my oldest child, a horrible "like" offender, off to college without first effectively removing the word from his vocabulary.  I tried but I was obviously very lacking in my ability to do so.  They must be doing something right, however, because upon arriving home for Thanksgiving vacation, I noticed that this child speaks with less frequent interruptions of that annoying word.

Part of the problem is that they don't see the problem.  Or rather, they don't hear it.  Two of our children, the worst of the worst, do not even notice the number of "likes" in their speech.  Until I mention it and start counting.  At which point the offending child cannot even finish his/her story because removing the word is foreign and as if I've asked them to finish the conversation in a new language.

I have one very sweet, obedient, and lovely child who has kicked the habit on his own and all but completely eradicated the exasperating verbal vomit.  How did he do it?  After trying to listen to several peers speak to a large group of people, he realized how distracting the word was.  At the end of the presentation he was certain that what they said must have been profound and life-changing but because his brain was stuck on listening to (and counting) each utterance of "like" he couldn't concentrate.

What a good boy.  There is hope!