A time to ask

On the same day that we were given Victor's diagnosis of Bilateral Optic Nerve Hypoplasia (or Septo Optic Dysplasia), we also found out that Heidi Baker was scheduled to be in the area for a conference this past weekend.

Heidi Baker and her husband, Rolland, are missionaries in Mozambique and founders of Iris Ministries.  Heidi has also prayed over many who were once blind but who now see.  The question was asked, "Do you think you should try to get in to see her?"

But her conference was full.

So we tried the friend of a friend of a friend who was on the planning team.

And we found out earlier this week that the door was shut.

The question came back, "Do you think you should try another method?  Wait for her in the parking lot, perhaps?"

I prayed.  Oh, how I prayed.  And we fasted along with many friends and family members.  Fasting for Victor's sight, to grow closer to God, and for clarity in this situation.

Finally, the response came to me, "You have to ask."

Whether or not Victor ever sees doesn't matter to me.  I love him as he is, I know he is our son, and we will do whatever we need to do to give him the best chance at life.  But if we have not because we ask not, then I need to ask.  If we don't see miracles because we don't ask for them, then I need to ask.

So we went to the conference at the time we thought Heidi would be ending her talk.  We walked right in without a ticket.  And she had just gotten started.

(Father, forgive me for I have sinned - walking in without a ticket and all.  On the other hand, I'm certain Jesus never charged money when He was speaking to a crowd.  And to be honest, we did have a friend at home who had willingly offered to post bail if necessary.  Oh, and we did park in the "Reserved for the Worship Team" parking place.  I'm truly sorry.  On the other hand, I guess the event organizers can be thankful that our friends didn't cut a hole in the ceiling and let us down with ropes.)

We listened to her speak, and speak, and speak some more, and say she was about to wrap up, only to repeat that again 40 minutes later.  She spoke on compassion and joy and the Holy Spirit and evangelism.

And then the session was over and we did our best to push through the crowds, step over those slain in the spirit, only to get closer to Heidi.  We inched our way.  A man asked if he could pray over Victor.  He prayed that blind eyes would see.  We inched closer.  A woman carrying a baby asked if we wanted to get to Heidi.  She parted the way for us to inch closer.  Finally we were on one side of the podium; Heidi was on the other.  One of the event leaders came and asked us if we wanted Heidi to pray for our baby.  She then led Heidi right to us.

She sat down and she took Victor in her arms.  And my baby, who has a difficult time settling down, slept soundly in her arms for the next 15 or 20 minutes while she ignored the crowds to focus on us.  She reminded us that the same Jesus who healed the blind, loves our son and can heal him, too.  But she mostly spoke to us of adoption, and love, being forerunners, and bringing our story to many.  She held our hands and looked at us with love in her eyes.  She silently prayed.  Then she touched her finger to her lips and touched Victor's eyes.

Heidi Baker isn't the focus of our worship.  But she serves the same God we do, one who still does miracles today.  And she has the gift of healing.  We had to ask.

And Victor slept through the night, from that moment until 6:00 this morning.  That has never happened before.

This morning, a friend who works for the airlines had the privilege of checking Heidi Baker in at the airport and they talked about our precious Victor.

These are not coincidences; these are God moments.  Each and every one orchestrated by Someone bigger than all of us and all of our circumstances.  Each one a miracle in itself.

We have to ask.

Community

Community.  It's what the early church was all about.  They shared everything.

As I've wrestled with the American Church and wondered how much of it is what God really intends, I've come to believe that there are two necessary ingredients which come from the first Christians.

The first is sold-out service, or radical giving of ourselves to those who are hurting, the subject of another post for another day.

The second is community.  We need to encourage and support each other as we live out our lives of service to others.

I have never experienced community like we have experienced it during our journey to Victor Noah.

The first time we stepped out in faith, many in our faith community turned on us.  They questioned why we were doing what we were doing.  We struggled in an environment where the leaders around us didn't ask, "How can we support you as you follow God's call?" They weren't excited to see where God would lead.  Instead they got angry and others followed suit.  Looking back, it was a time of tremendous growth and leaning on Christ but in the moment it was the most difficult time in my life. I also believe it was necessary to go through that in preparation for the journey we are now on.  It was moving higher on the ladder of giving Christ total control and trusting His ways even though we can't see the outcome.

This time, when we stepped out of the boat, the response has been the total opposite.  While a few have questioned our actions, it was done lovingly and with a desire to understand where God is moving.  The support has been overwhelming.  We have experienced Community with a capital C.

Each member of our supporting Community has acted out of his/her strengths, gifts, and availability.  Some brought meals, some provided transportation, some donated money, and some cleaned.  Others taught lessons, donated services, or threw in a load of laundry.

And you prayed.  I hope that in Heaven we can "see" the power of all of these prayers.  We have felt them, we have seen evidence of them, and someday I'd love to know them from God's perspective.

But then the call came to fast.  And again, the Community rose up to support us.  And for some of you, this fast is bringing trials that you certainly didn't ask for.  Yesterday's post brought numerous Facebook and email messages.  Satan is doing his best to block this fast.  He has tried to block this little boy's life from the very beginning but prayer has allowed him to be victorious and to amaze.  But that's not just Victor's story; it's your story, too.  God has great plans for your life.  You are here to let His glory be known.  Fasting is drawing you closer to Him and Satan does not like it.  Press on.

And now I have one more request from the Community.  The vision therapist was here today and talked about different toys and repurposed items that will be useful in developing Victor's tactile and auditory senses.  She mentioned a quilt of various textured materials from silky to rough, from knobby to smooth.  I have some textured fabrics but I'd love more.  I could spend money to buy some but I'd rather not.  I'd love to have donations from any of my sewing and crafty friends so that Victor's quilt is not just textures to feel but representative of the love of the Community.  I don't need much, just a swatch big enough to cut out a 6 in. square.  Color doesn't matter; the texture is key.  What fabric do you have left-over from that creative project?  Anything other than cotton calico fabric.  Ribbons, too.  Pieces long enough to make hooks for him to hold and to explore.  Bring them on!  Let's make Victor a Community Quilt!

Gratitude and apologizing

First of all, thank you.

Secondly, I'm sorry.

Thank you for joining us in fasting and prayer for Victor's sight.  There are at least 30 people storming Heaven's gates for the miraculous healing of Victor's eyes.  There are probably many more that I don't know about.

Our senior pastor wrote these words in his weekly email:

I love the picture the Apostle John paints for us in Revelation chapter 8 verses 1-5, about what happens with our prayers: When he opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. And I saw the seven angels who stand before God, and to them were given seven trumpets. Another angel, who had a golden censer, came and stood at the altar. He was given much incense to offer, with the prayers of all the saints, on the golden altar before the throne. The smoke of the incense, together with the prayers of the saints, went up before God from the angel’s hand. Then the angel took the censer, filled it with fire from the altar, and hurled it on the earth; and there came peals of thunder, rumblings, flashes of lightning and an earthquake. Do you see it? Our prayers are being collected in heaven and they are poured back upon the earth. Author Eugene Peterson calls this, “reverse thunder.” I’m reminded of Jesus’ prayer, “May your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” Our prayers are the bridge between God and his purposes being realized on the earth. These verses from Revelation come to mind in the context of two “prayer events” I’d like to share with you this morning… First, I’d like to invite you to join with many in McBIC’s church family and others outside of this church in praying for Victor Noah King’s healing.   Victor is John & Cindy King’s adopted, newborn son. Since Victor’s pre-mature birth earlier this year there have been concerns about his eyesight and last week he was diagnosed with probable blindness. Dallas & Faye Shelly—prayer partners of John and Cindy King—sent out an email to our staff, prayer partners of the Kings and family members, suggesting a time of fasting and prayer for Victor’s healing and for issues related to his medical care financial coverage today, tomorrow and Saturday. I want to encourage you to join with us in fasting and praying for Victor. In fasting, we give up physical food in some way as a reminder that our true sustenance comes from our Heavenly Father. The hunger pangs or physical/emotional effects of not eating also serve as a reminder of our commitment to pray. Fasting may consist of giving up food for the entire time; fasting a meal each day; or, fasting something like dessert, coffee or sodas. People also fast things like: watching T.V., facebook, or reading the newspaper.

But you know, I've had this sense that this time of fasting and prayer is as much about each of our hearts as it is for Victor Noah.  His healing may even be secondary.

So I say I'm sorry because I know that some of you are experiencing spiritual attack in the midst of your prayer and fasting.  Trouble at work, sickness, unexplained anger, Facebook attacks and distractions, I've heard of all of these just in the first day.

Friends, press on.  Play some worship music.  Pray more. Send your prayers Heaven-ward while you allow God to do some heart work.  This is all about His glory, it always has been and always will be.

In our own ways

HopeAnne:  I was crying in my bed last night.
Me:  You were?  Why didn't you call me?  What were you crying about?
HopeAnne:  I was thinking about Victor's eyes and I was crying.

Once again I am both humbled and amazed at the responses of our friends and family.  You have embraced Victor, his story, and our family.  You've cried tears for him.  You've shouted that this is not fair, he's overcome so much already!  And now many of you are willing to fast and pray for him, each in his/her own way.

Our God is a God of miracles.  I believe that.  I believe that He wants us to ask for Victor's sight.  He is calling some of us to fast for Victor's sight.  I believe that He can do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine.

I also believe that He wants to do a work in each of our hearts and this is about so much more than Victor's sight.

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Prayer and fasting

One of our dear prayer partners contacted us today to tell us that as she read about Victor's diagnosis and his vision, she felt called by God to organize a time of prayer and fasting.  We would love to have you join us if you feel led to do so.  This is being organized for Sept. 26, 27 and 28, to fast in whatever way you wish.  She explains it so well so I'm including her letter here.  If you decide to join us, we'd love to hear from you, either in a comment below, a Facebook message, or an email. 

"Dear Friends and Family of the King Family,

Dallas and I were away, so read the blog about Victor for the first time Sunday evening. As I, Faye, was thinking about it all, I "heard" that I should "call a fast" for Victor and his healing and for financial issues regarding him to be resolved. I am tardy in following through, ("Really, Lord, you want ME to do this?") but almost two days later, I know that this is to be. I feel inadequate to be doing this, but obedience is the issue. :)

Growing up, I observed that fasting with prayer was often engaged in by members of my church/denomination for spiritual breakthroughs. These days it seems to be a somewhat neglected discipline by many believers (This is directed to me, too.) The Bible often mentions fasting with prayer. Jesus assumed that we would fast when He said in Matthew 6:16, "When you fast . . ." not IF you fast, assuming that we will.

There are books written about fasting; I have several, and in prayerfully consulting them, I am suggesting a three days food-related fast for healing and for covering and protection for Victor and his family. How and when God uses this is up to Him!

Fasts can be quite varied - each of us can prayerfully determine what it is to be, whether all food, a meal a day, desserts, sugar, just vegetables, etc. Combine the self denial with prayer and it becomes fasting for spiritual breakthrough (title of a book).

In order to be united in this, I am suggesting the days of September 26, 27, 28th, this coming Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Knowing that others are joining you is encouraging and faith building and the power that unity brings is great. So, please click "reply to all" and sign on, not what you are doing, but that you are joining in. If you don't care to participate or to reply that you are, that is just fine. I know that the King family will be encouraged by knowing we care and want to put our concern and caring into spiritual warfare action.

God bless each of you,

Faye Shelly"  

Planning for the future

I signed my first document today with the words "special needs child" on them.  The receptionist handed it over mumbling something sweet and smiling as if I was signing a release for some prize I'd just won.  I didn't even realize what I was signing until I read the brochure that came with it.  I know, I know, I should read the fine print.  You can judge me as soon as you've signed as many HIPAA forms as I have.

Funny, since when John and I were dating, I was the one wanting to adopt a house full of special needs children.  The Good Doctor wanted nothing to do with it.

Warning:  If you plan to marry someone with God-given plans, you can pretty much assume God is going to change you, too.  Just ask the Good Doctor.

But I'll admit that this wasn't in my plans.  I had my special needs plans all planned out - Down Syndrome, Check, I've worked with many children in this category and just adore them.  Deafness, Check, John and I sign, the kids sign a little, and we are familiar with Deaf culture.

Blindness?  Um.  I read a book about a blind man who walked the Appalachian Trail with his guide dog.  That's about all I know.

And then, every time my mind starts going down the path of, This wasn't in my plans, I have to remind myself that I'm not in charge of the world (controlling people need to remind themselves of this quite often).  If I were, what a mess that would be.  I can think of plenty of times when my need to have my life planned out goes awry.  Planning for a family of ten isn't always easy, either.  So, if I had to orchestrate the events of everyone on this planet, whoever was, and is, and will be?  Well, of course there's no way.

That's where my hope lies.  I know that I can trust the One who does have it all under control; the one who knows my comings and goings before I plan them and who orchestrates them exactly so that He receives the glory.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:11-13 is spoken often, and often out of context.  Someone handed them to me in church, written on a small slip of paper, earlier in our adoption journey.  I needed them that day and they are just as relevant today.  God's intent is never to harm us, only to give us hope and a future.  A future with an ending we already know; a future where Victor receives his sight and none of us will suffer anymore.  That's some planning I'm waiting for!

This is part of the plan for Victor and for us and we can walk forward confidently.  He is ours and we are his family.  Love. Redemption. God's plan.

And then to confirm it, I just read a letter from friends at church.  It included the words to a song I had never heard before called Promise, performed by Liberated Wailing Wall.  How fitting!

There's no hope that is too high
For a love that covers the skies
The quiet whispers in your heart
May be a light in the dark
Don't you know what I can do
Oh, the plans I have for you

Plans to prosper to make you grow
Plans for you to make my light show
Plans to make your dreams come true
Plans for your life I give to you

Desires no one knows
I'll open doors no man can close
Live your life, watch what I'll do
'Cause oh, the plans I have for you

When you pray I will hear
If you search I will be near
Gather and restore all your land
Oh, the plans that I have planned

I'll bring you back again

Live your life, watch what I'll do
'Cause oh, the plans I have for you

His eye is on the sparrow

So many kind words of encouragement and I cherish them all.

"You are braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."  Christopher Robin

His Eye Is On the Sparrow

words by Civilla Martin

Why should I feel discouraged,

Why should the shadows come,

Why should my heart be lonely,

And long for heaven and home,

When Jesus is my portion?

My constant friend is He:

His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me.

I sing because I'm happy,

I sing because I'm free,

For His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me.

"Let not your heart be troubled," 

His tender word I hear,

And resting on His goodness,

I lose my doubts and fears;

Though by the path He leadeth,

But one step I may see;

His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me;

His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me.

Whenever I am tempted,

Whenever clouds arise,

When songs give place to sighing,

When hope within me dies,

I draw the closer to Him,

From care He sets me free;

His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me;

His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me.

(The beautiful story behind this hymn is here)